deep thoughts & 13 months

Lately, I have been having a difficult time organizing my thoughts. Actually, it’s not just my thoughts, but all of my modes of artistic expression. I suppose it would be easier if I just chose one, to just tell myself, “OK! You’re going to choose this one, Master only this, Do Only This for the rest of your life!” But, I just can’t bring myself to be that type of disciplined. The struggle is being the other sort of disciplined and continuing to write, continuing to design & make jewelry, and continuing to paint, while at the same time continuing to have a social life, continuing to spend time with family, exercising, eating healthy, and enjoying simple pleasures like reading, gardening, and drinking bourbon.

My thoughts are constant. That is and has always been the type of person I am. Constantly thinking, constantly imagining, constantly dreaming. The truth is all this constant thinking gets in the way of the Actual Doing. I’m trying. They say that’s the best you can do, but is it? Doing and accomplishing are far better than trying. I digress.

When I applied to Chateau Orquevaux, I wrote in my application that one of my goals for this year is to blend “all the mediums of my artistic life, bringing together my writing, my jewelry, and my painting.” and that my goal for my Residency will be “to launch myself into Part Deux of this artistic life.” This is where my mind has been for the past month - attempting to BLEND.